When I was in college and nearing graduation there were career fairs held throughout the Spring. Some were local, here in New York. Others were in DC or neighboring cities just outside the metropolitan area. One Spring afternoon, I found myself on the Chinatown bus to DC, headed to such an event.
The typical lay of the land for one of these things is you walk around a large hall filled with tables of potential employers, as they try to entice you to talk to their recruiters. They beckon with displays of candy, branded post its, and free pens. As I walked from table to table I found myself in conversation with a recruiter from a small nonprofit organization looking for someone who fit my work and volunteer background nearly perfectly. We spoke excitedly about helping underserved youth and providing mentoring services. Finally I got around to asking the question: What's the pay?
What happened next defined the trajectory of my career.
$22,000
Holy cow. And I would have to move to DC. And I would have to buy a car, and get insurance and find a place to live. $22,000. That works out to about $600 every two weeks.
But the job was perfect. Helping people was something I believed in. But, did I believe in it enough to trade all of my time for very little money? Could I live on that? Was that fair? I mean, I was graduating from NYU a full year early with a Bachelor's in English. I had great grades and a bevy of clubs and volunteer activities under my belt. I was a catch. Was I only worth $22,000? And what about all those kids who slaved away in the business school instead of reading Chaucer and Melville for the last 3 years like I did? Was their education worth more than mine? Was their time worth more than mine? I didn't want to believe it. I had to decide, what was I after? Did I go to school to make money or did I go to school to make the most use of my time? And what was the difference?
I took that job. I bought a car. I moved to DC. I worked 60-70 hour work weeks. And I collected $600/week. I bought gas and groceries on a credit card. I picked up a part time job. I prayed not to have to go to the auto mechanic. Not having money, meant I didn't have any time. "Free time"? No such thing. I had traded all of my time for very little money.
Everyone knows the phrase that time is money. What I discovered very quickly is that the reverse is also true: money is time. Picking a career is not about how much you are worth. It's about what you are willing to trade for your time. If I had taken a cushy corporate job, making $40,000 straight out of school, working a traditional 9-5, I would have had a little bit more money yes, but I would have had a lot more time. And the time, is way more valuable than the cash. By getting the money out of the way, I eliminated the need for working overtime and a part time job, the hours spent manipulating a bare bones checking register, the hours talking to American Express. I would have been taking dance classes and going to church, and meeting new friends and reading new books. You can't put a price tag on your time. Yet, that's how most new jobseekers conceptualize salary requirements.
Everyday I sit down with people who go to work because they have to not because they want to. I guarantee if you ask someone "If money were no object, where would you be at 3 pm on Tuesday?" they aren't going to say "at work". We trade our time for money everyday. But the most valuable thing in the transaction is not the money. It's the time. What we are all really after is the time.
I'm not a securities broker. I'm a time dealer. I trade in the one commodity that is truly universal regardless of age, creed, ethnicity, or nationality. 24 hours a day/7 days a week/365 days a year is the same ration for every man, women and child on the planet. You can always make more money, but you will never be able to make more time.
Work for 30 years, and retire for 40 years. Work for 5 hours a day, and be with family 19 hours a day. Spend 8 months a year on your business and 4 months a year on vacation. My job is to negotiate those ratios. It's not about where and how you are earning your money. True job satisfaction is about where and how you are spending your time.
Day 9s reason my business is interesting: I'm a time dealer.
Thursday, January 15, 2015
Tuesday, January 13, 2015
The Hero Inside You
There's a hero, if you like inside your heart. You don't have to be afraid of what you are.
Mariah Carey may be on the decline in her career, but the girl knew what she was talking about with that song. I've been reading a book, How to Win Friends and Influence People. You may have heard of it. Dale Carnegie, the author is the godfather of self improvement. The book covers basic concepts like smiling, being interested in others, eliminating criticism from your vocabulary as a means of connecting with people. Liking people, and understanding how to make them like you is good for you and it's good for them.
I hate to say that this is something I need to work on, but that's truth. Empathy is not always my strong suit. I understand the Golden Rule when it comes to manners, common courtesies. But I suppose, thinking about the Golden Rule when it comes to conversing and engaging people in conversation, in how I want people to be interested in me, to interact with me, I can honestly acknowledge that I never thought it mattered that much. I will be the first to say, that I am learning how to like people.
I have been infusing the concepts from the book in my day to day work, comings and goings. Asking people about themselves, making eye contact in the hallway, smiling. It works. It makes me feel better, and it makes other people feel better.
I had an appointment with a new client this evening. The husband scheduled it, but I met with the wife because he had to work over time. First appointments are always information gathering and finding out what the need is. I spent an hour talking to her about their finances, what their dreams are, what their jobs are like and what they would rather be doing instead. We worked together, thinking through their game plan for buying a house for their daughter (she wants a swing in the front). It was a great conversation and at the end of it, I had enough information to write a financial plan for their family - or at least the beginnings of one.
This is my gig - finding out what people want and mapping a way for them to get there.
Zig Ziglar was right: The easiest way to get what you want is to help enough people to get what they want. I just have to get good at finding out what people want - talking to them, being interested in their lives, being nice to them, building relationships with them, educating them for them for the long term so they can make smarter decisions and help them help themselves get to their dreams. I just have to be the best version of me, and my reward is that I get to be a professional hero. I get to be the go to person, the one who made a difference.
Day 8s reason my job is awesome: By being kind to people, I make my living as a professional hero
When the going gets tough, the tough get better.
Monday, January 12, 2015
God, Family, Business
Today I spent all day with my family. I slept in late with my husband. I put a movie on for my kids. We played. It was a great lazy Sunday to round out a weekend where I worked hard and played hard. Went to some parties with friends and still made time for 6 client appointments and prepping for my week.
In this business, they tell you all the time that your priorities should be God first, family second and business third. It's much harder to pull off then it sounds, but to me that means that when I spend all day with my family, I get to feel great about it. There is no guilt in thinking that my family is taking away from my career or vice versa. I get to have it all. I'm in a business dedicated to helping families be okay and along the way, my family gets to be great.
Day 7s reason my business is awesome: A Sunday as lazy as I want it to be.
In this business, they tell you all the time that your priorities should be God first, family second and business third. It's much harder to pull off then it sounds, but to me that means that when I spend all day with my family, I get to feel great about it. There is no guilt in thinking that my family is taking away from my career or vice versa. I get to have it all. I'm in a business dedicated to helping families be okay and along the way, my family gets to be great.
Day 7s reason my business is awesome: A Sunday as lazy as I want it to be.
Sunday, January 11, 2015
Social Capital on the Rise
Life is unpredictable which means that people are very predictable. This fact helps me manage my business if I just accept it.
I read a lot. I listen to a lot of modern philosophy. I study people so that I can understand how to connect to them, how to help them, and how to put them at ease.
Today I had 6 appointments and 3 of them rescheduled at the last minute. One had to help a friend, the other was running behind on errands and the third was trying to finish a project so he could get paid. All apologized profusely and expressed how much they wanted to start working with me, . . .but for today, life happened to "get in the way".
My Coach told me this would happen. She told me that because of my full time job I should, "Do all of your appointments on the weekend and double book them all, because you know, half of them will cancel." I didn't believe her, and I made my calls and tentatively set my appointments spreading them out so I could wrap one and be on time to the next, and all that got me was a lot of dead field time ( I used tit to make calls and study CE but still).
Coach was right. People are predictable. You can count on them to choose the need that is right in front of them over seeking out the potential satisfaction of a future goal.
The best part is, this time was different from any other time I've had people flake. In the past, people would cancel, they would forget, they wouldn't be home when I showed up. But this was the first time that all my no shows, very pointedly and proactively reached out to me to say they needed to move things around. This was also the first time that I told people they needed to prep their paperwork and refer me to their friends if they wanted me to work with them. I gave the impression that what I was offering was 1)customized for them and 2) provided with contingencies - a special arrangement. It's like when someone tells you "they got a guy" who can provide a service you need. I just became "the guy" (really "the lady"). I made their appointment something special in their mind - a way of paying special attention to them. So when they all opted to meet an immediate need or satiate an immediate desire over planning their future and allowing me to focus on them, they knew an apology, a phone call was warranted. If you treat people special, you increase your value to them. Today I became a golden goose.
Day 6's reason my business is awesome: By edifying others and making them feel special, I increase my social capital
I read a lot. I listen to a lot of modern philosophy. I study people so that I can understand how to connect to them, how to help them, and how to put them at ease.
Today I had 6 appointments and 3 of them rescheduled at the last minute. One had to help a friend, the other was running behind on errands and the third was trying to finish a project so he could get paid. All apologized profusely and expressed how much they wanted to start working with me, . . .but for today, life happened to "get in the way".
My Coach told me this would happen. She told me that because of my full time job I should, "Do all of your appointments on the weekend and double book them all, because you know, half of them will cancel." I didn't believe her, and I made my calls and tentatively set my appointments spreading them out so I could wrap one and be on time to the next, and all that got me was a lot of dead field time ( I used tit to make calls and study CE but still).
Coach was right. People are predictable. You can count on them to choose the need that is right in front of them over seeking out the potential satisfaction of a future goal.
The best part is, this time was different from any other time I've had people flake. In the past, people would cancel, they would forget, they wouldn't be home when I showed up. But this was the first time that all my no shows, very pointedly and proactively reached out to me to say they needed to move things around. This was also the first time that I told people they needed to prep their paperwork and refer me to their friends if they wanted me to work with them. I gave the impression that what I was offering was 1)customized for them and 2) provided with contingencies - a special arrangement. It's like when someone tells you "they got a guy" who can provide a service you need. I just became "the guy" (really "the lady"). I made their appointment something special in their mind - a way of paying special attention to them. So when they all opted to meet an immediate need or satiate an immediate desire over planning their future and allowing me to focus on them, they knew an apology, a phone call was warranted. If you treat people special, you increase your value to them. Today I became a golden goose.
Day 6's reason my business is awesome: By edifying others and making them feel special, I increase my social capital
Friday, January 9, 2015
What About Your Friends?
The first album I ever played out til the tape was no good was TLC CrazySexyCool. The album is home to such classics as "Waterfalls", "Red Light Special" and of course "What about your friends"
Network marketing is not for the faint of heart. It requires you to step outside of your comfort zone, learn how to talk to strangers, and sell yourself on a singular idea or concept to the point of it being your consuming occupation. Malcolm Gladwell says that to become great at anything requires 10,000 hours of dedicated work. Is there anything in your life right now that you could say you have practiced and perfected for at least 10,000 hours of your life? If you do, then most likely, your friends and family know you as the go-to person for that skill. If they don't then you probably 1) aren't as good as you think you are or 2) are terrible at marketing.
In the networking marketing business, self promotion is the name of the game. Because the business model relies upon word of mouth as the primary source of marketing and promotion, most firms will tell you point blank that you need to start with your warm market and run a viral ad campaign for yourself through your personal networks.
I was never what you would call a social dynamo. I never had thousands and thousands of friends on Facebook, and I only jumped on Twitter about a year ago. Even growing up in school, I wouldn't say I was popular or "that girl". But, one thing that I have always been proud of is my close circle of true and reliable friends.
When I joined this business I reached out to my warm market (consisting mostly of friends of friends and family and loose associations, acquaintances. I made those initial calls and asked for help. I introduced people to the concept, I asked for referrals. I did have some successes. The most success to date stems from referrals from my sister, who is by far my #1 fan and closest friend (next to my husband). But what I soon realized is that anyone who can't tell you to your face that they think you are wrong, is not your friend at all.
I've had people sit and listen to me (humor me really) and then refuse to return my phone calls, or write me off as naive. But, I know that even though I may be working on hundreds of hours of experience right now, by the time I get to 10,000 all those naysayers will be long gone and me and all my real friends are gonna be living the dream. It's not their fault. They just don't get it. TLC says:
Network marketing is not for the faint of heart. It requires you to step outside of your comfort zone, learn how to talk to strangers, and sell yourself on a singular idea or concept to the point of it being your consuming occupation. Malcolm Gladwell says that to become great at anything requires 10,000 hours of dedicated work. Is there anything in your life right now that you could say you have practiced and perfected for at least 10,000 hours of your life? If you do, then most likely, your friends and family know you as the go-to person for that skill. If they don't then you probably 1) aren't as good as you think you are or 2) are terrible at marketing.
In the networking marketing business, self promotion is the name of the game. Because the business model relies upon word of mouth as the primary source of marketing and promotion, most firms will tell you point blank that you need to start with your warm market and run a viral ad campaign for yourself through your personal networks.
I was never what you would call a social dynamo. I never had thousands and thousands of friends on Facebook, and I only jumped on Twitter about a year ago. Even growing up in school, I wouldn't say I was popular or "that girl". But, one thing that I have always been proud of is my close circle of true and reliable friends.
When I joined this business I reached out to my warm market (consisting mostly of friends of friends and family and loose associations, acquaintances. I made those initial calls and asked for help. I introduced people to the concept, I asked for referrals. I did have some successes. The most success to date stems from referrals from my sister, who is by far my #1 fan and closest friend (next to my husband). But what I soon realized is that anyone who can't tell you to your face that they think you are wrong, is not your friend at all.
I've had people sit and listen to me (humor me really) and then refuse to return my phone calls, or write me off as naive. But, I know that even though I may be working on hundreds of hours of experience right now, by the time I get to 10,000 all those naysayers will be long gone and me and all my real friends are gonna be living the dream. It's not their fault. They just don't get it. TLC says:
What about your friends. Will they stand their ground. Will they let you down again . What about your friends, are they gonna be low down. Will they ever be around or turn their backs on you.Lucius Annaeus Seneca said it another way:
One of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship is to understand and to be understood.Day 5's reason my business is awesome: You find the people that "get" you
Thursday, January 8, 2015
Goal Setting and Goal Hitting
I listen to a lot of nonfiction audio these days, especially when it comes to business advice. Now, I can't recall where I heard this little tidbit, but it warrants sharing:
It's a new year and I have (like most of us) great aspirations for 2015, so this blog is now officially taking a turn to capture the experience of me going from working for the man to working for this woman.
Day 4: Today is Thursday, day 4 of work after a long 2 week Winter Break spent eating, sleeping and enjoying time with my family. One of the things that my husband and I have committed to is keeping a sleeping schedule (Up by 6:30am and bed by 11pm). The bed by 11 pm is the most important because the sleep is what gets you through all the other goals we have set for the day ahead.
Typical of a post vacation work week, Monday was great. Tuesday was good. Wednesday was rough and today I got up at 7:20. --We are starting to lose some steam here people. Now, the great thing about my business is that I am surrounded by people that want me to be successful. I work in the financial services business through a network marketing firm and so all of my mentors and coaches are personally financially invested in my success in order to fuel their own. This is great. The other thing is my job is centered around building relationships working your network - a great way to test the strengths of current bonds
Awesome thing #1: Weekly trainings and motivational sessions. Every Wednesday night I go to a training where local representatives get together and work on getting better. Yesterday we focused on building rapport with clients, doing what's right 100% of the time, and some principles that could best be descried as good ol' karma: Do for others and the rest takes care of itself. That is a great thing to have as a staple in your career and business life - steadfast morals and a foundation of integrity that is upheld throughout the organization.
Awesome thing #2: I get to influence people I never would have met if not for this business. One of my goals for the year is to make 16 appointments for myself every week. Any person who has ever worked in sales knows that you don't set appointments without making calls. And every salesperson also knows that no one likes making calls. Hence, the need for concrete and specific goals. I set my goal for making 60 calls between Monday and Wednesday (20 calls/day). Now because I only have 2 hours a day scheduled to make my calls, I do have to make the most of that time. I use a homegrown lead management system to track my numbers and keep up with prospects as I go, and in December on average I could do 20 calls/hour and set 20% of those people for appointments. Yesterday, I started 30 minutes late and ended an hour early (for those of you not picking up on the math, I only made 30 minutes worth of calls).
The great news is Parkinson's law holds true:
So Day 4's reason my business is awesome: You get more than one corner man. Even Eagles need a push.
Write something about the impact of your business everyday. And if you don't have anything interesting to write about, get into another business.
It's a new year and I have (like most of us) great aspirations for 2015, so this blog is now officially taking a turn to capture the experience of me going from working for the man to working for this woman.
Day 4: Today is Thursday, day 4 of work after a long 2 week Winter Break spent eating, sleeping and enjoying time with my family. One of the things that my husband and I have committed to is keeping a sleeping schedule (Up by 6:30am and bed by 11pm). The bed by 11 pm is the most important because the sleep is what gets you through all the other goals we have set for the day ahead.
Typical of a post vacation work week, Monday was great. Tuesday was good. Wednesday was rough and today I got up at 7:20. --We are starting to lose some steam here people. Now, the great thing about my business is that I am surrounded by people that want me to be successful. I work in the financial services business through a network marketing firm and so all of my mentors and coaches are personally financially invested in my success in order to fuel their own. This is great. The other thing is my job is centered around building relationships working your network - a great way to test the strengths of current bonds
Awesome thing #1: Weekly trainings and motivational sessions. Every Wednesday night I go to a training where local representatives get together and work on getting better. Yesterday we focused on building rapport with clients, doing what's right 100% of the time, and some principles that could best be descried as good ol' karma: Do for others and the rest takes care of itself. That is a great thing to have as a staple in your career and business life - steadfast morals and a foundation of integrity that is upheld throughout the organization.
Awesome thing #2: I get to influence people I never would have met if not for this business. One of my goals for the year is to make 16 appointments for myself every week. Any person who has ever worked in sales knows that you don't set appointments without making calls. And every salesperson also knows that no one likes making calls. Hence, the need for concrete and specific goals. I set my goal for making 60 calls between Monday and Wednesday (20 calls/day). Now because I only have 2 hours a day scheduled to make my calls, I do have to make the most of that time. I use a homegrown lead management system to track my numbers and keep up with prospects as I go, and in December on average I could do 20 calls/hour and set 20% of those people for appointments. Yesterday, I started 30 minutes late and ended an hour early (for those of you not picking up on the math, I only made 30 minutes worth of calls).
The great news is Parkinson's law holds true:
Work expands so as to fill the time available for completionI was able to make 17 calls in those 30 minutes!! The truly significant thing was call number 17. I was not expecting call number 17 to answer but he did. The gentleman is a member of my church and we spoke for an hour about the changes at the church, what it means to be a Christian and how we could support each other (I'm going to help him edit a book of inspirational writings). As the conversation ended, he told me to go home and give my husband a big hug and kiss, because having someone in your corner is invaluable and you want to make sure they know that "while their eyes are open". I heeded this very sound advice.
So Day 4's reason my business is awesome: You get more than one corner man. Even Eagles need a push.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Nothing more to say (All Screamed Out)
I hate being little and young looking. I am literally the same size I was when I got my driver’s license and that is not a good thing unless you want to make looking young your career, and I don't see anyone coming to sign me a contract for The Hills, Brooklyn edition. I wish I was bigger and scarier but I am not. I am vulnerable all the time. You may not understand that or see that but it is true. I fight hard to get things done, not because I like to but because I have no other choice if I want to get ahead. Because my whole life I can count on one hand the number of people that has ever taken me seriously.
Very few people know with certainty that I mean what I say and that I do what I say I am gong to do. I am a serious person. When I have ideas I move on them and that is how things get done. I am seriously not a 14 year old girl. But the only time in my life I can remember a really good compliment is when someone told me that I was “a force”. No one refers to me as a force. If anything people say I “have good ideas” or I “do a lot”, "read a lot" but a force is a thing of nature that cannot be denied. That is a compelling irresistible call to action. Most of the time, people take me for a 14 year old girl who still has “so much to learn” and is easy to scam and the horrible part is that I always get scammed, because I do not realize I am not being taken seriously until it is too late. Call it a heroic flaw if you will. Somehow I have not learned how to take command of a situation even after all this time. I blame it on my unfettered trust in the goodness of mankind.
People take advantage of me to know end, because when I fight back, I get ignored. I tell a deadbeat tenant to get out of my house and I am ignored until I actually file the paperwork and the sheriff locks the doors. I tell my boss she is being inequitable in the distribution of the workload and my she schedules a planning meeting for how I can travel 100 more miles per week to further benefit the company. I get tired of fighting because everyone I interact with refuses to take me seriously.
I am tired of this. I want to scream and would . . . all the time if I thought someone would hear me. (It is the tree in the forest after all). But apparently my voice doesn’t count. It’s hard to feel big when everyone makes you feel so small. That’s what I mean when I say life is hard enough, because all of this getting walked on starts to wear on a person and makes it real hard to see the point in fighting at all. Would it not be easier to give up and not complain and just take the lumps that life dishes out? It will end eventually right? Right? It’s not like I have control of any of it anyway. I am tired of being walked on. So when I say I’m done, don’t think I am bluffing, because you might just get your feelings hurt and then there really will be no more to say.
Very few people know with certainty that I mean what I say and that I do what I say I am gong to do. I am a serious person. When I have ideas I move on them and that is how things get done. I am seriously not a 14 year old girl. But the only time in my life I can remember a really good compliment is when someone told me that I was “a force”. No one refers to me as a force. If anything people say I “have good ideas” or I “do a lot”, "read a lot" but a force is a thing of nature that cannot be denied. That is a compelling irresistible call to action. Most of the time, people take me for a 14 year old girl who still has “so much to learn” and is easy to scam and the horrible part is that I always get scammed, because I do not realize I am not being taken seriously until it is too late. Call it a heroic flaw if you will. Somehow I have not learned how to take command of a situation even after all this time. I blame it on my unfettered trust in the goodness of mankind.
People take advantage of me to know end, because when I fight back, I get ignored. I tell a deadbeat tenant to get out of my house and I am ignored until I actually file the paperwork and the sheriff locks the doors. I tell my boss she is being inequitable in the distribution of the workload and my she schedules a planning meeting for how I can travel 100 more miles per week to further benefit the company. I get tired of fighting because everyone I interact with refuses to take me seriously.
I am tired of this. I want to scream and would . . . all the time if I thought someone would hear me. (It is the tree in the forest after all). But apparently my voice doesn’t count. It’s hard to feel big when everyone makes you feel so small. That’s what I mean when I say life is hard enough, because all of this getting walked on starts to wear on a person and makes it real hard to see the point in fighting at all. Would it not be easier to give up and not complain and just take the lumps that life dishes out? It will end eventually right? Right? It’s not like I have control of any of it anyway. I am tired of being walked on. So when I say I’m done, don’t think I am bluffing, because you might just get your feelings hurt and then there really will be no more to say.
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