To be Loved

There is a scene in the classic movie, Coming to America where Eddie Murphy, the wealthy prince of Zamunda sings at the top of his lungs in the middle of a darkened street in new York city. Never mind the fact that his sleeping neighbors are yelling obscenities at him in the hopes of shutting him up. This is a man who after working to win the affections of the woman he loves, is able to see it pay off as evidenced by the elusive first kiss she has bestowed on him earlier that very evening.

Oh to sing "to be loved" down any New York City street these days may not get you even the sideways glance from a seasoned New Yorker, but one has to admit that being acknowledged for your effort is a rare and wonderful thing. This year I did not go all out on big presents for friends and loved ones. I spent more time thinking about the people who affect my life every day with their labor and toil. There is a cheesy commercial out right now of a neighborhood woman buying a handful of scratch offs from her usual newsstand only to turn around and gift the cards to the stand owner who she knows on first name basis. How nice is that?

I know Christmas is notorious for the warm fuzzies that it emits into our breathing air and on some level it highlights how nasty people are to each other the rest of the months of the year, but there is some merit in that kindness, however misplaced or exploited. Imagine my surprise when I received a card and peppermint pattie from one of my office mates! And this from a woman I barely talk to. Something about receiving just because of who you are and what you do on an unconscious level feels better than anything else. It’s validation for who you are—a person just trying to get by like everyone else. Who would have thought just a simple acknowledgement could yields such great results?

So this Christmas, I got something for my security guard, my office aid and the mailman, because everyone likes to know they matter. I know when you receive from that unexpected someone this year that nod of approval will inevitably result in a smile. You may not feel like royalty falling in love in New York, but it will warm you up better than a tall glass of spiked eggnog, and I am all for that.